Political flim-flam

Since there's a gentleman's agreement throughout the blogosphere that every blogger must post in the hours immediately following the Iowa Caucus and the SOTU address, I thought I'd do both at once. Then I realized I had nothing to say. So I'll have to let the Daily Show's comment on the Caucus suffice (roughly quoted): "Apparently Dean will be driving to [New Hampshire] . . . in Truckosaurus. SUNDAY! SUNDAY! SUNDAY!"

As for the SOTU, I give you the Poor Man's take, which is perfect:

Shorter State Of The Union Speech

Only Battle-Action George W. Bush comes with Terror-Smashing Battle Action. I cannot stress this enough: only Battle-Action George W. Bush comes with Terror-Smashing Battle Action. From the Oval Office to the deck of the Freedom Crusade Action Flight Deck Playset, only George W. Bush has the moral whatever to defeat America's swarthiest enemies, and don't let the "oh, bullshit" looks I'm getting from the soldiers in the audience convince you otherwise.

COMMERCIAL BREAK

Only by making the tax cuts permanent can we defend darling Ashley Apocryphal's innocence from the cold truth about why Barry Bonds is suddenly a hundred times as big as he used to be, and keep our federal government-approved and -subsidized families together. Now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

Ah, feels good to get that over with.