Draft the 'stache, trade the Gay
Now that was an entertaining draft. It was probably thanks in no small part to notable absence of any NBA referees to screw it up. I'm sure Bill Simmons got plenty of material for his annual draft diary, so I'll stick to the highlights.
I think Bargnani fits well in Toronto, provided those highlight videos of him on the perimeter aren't being played at 1.5x speed. And adding P.J. Tucker to Joey Graham on the bench gives them good muscle, energy, and defense. If they can get a decent young point guard when they sign and trade Mike James, they'll actually be looking good for the future. How the hell did that happen?
Oddly, Portland had a very solid draft. They can take it as a good sign that Steven A. Smith was berating their choices. Nothing like Smith and Greg Anthony taking pot shots at easy targets, this time a franchise whose last few years are pretty pathetic. But they went way out of their way to piss on the Blazers’ draft tonight. Portland picks up two high lottery picks, including the most NBA-ready player (Roy) in this draft; a solid late first-round talent; and a couple long-term projects. All they give up is a busted former #13 pick, some foreign guy who’s last name begins, phonetically, with “crap,” Theo Ratliff’s useless ass, and a little cash. And yet, Smith claims he just has no idea what the Blazers are doing. Huh? What a fucktard. Anywyas, Portland needs to make dumping Darius Miles and Zach Randolph its top three priorities.
Adam Morrison’s appearance lived up to expectations. With that haircut he looked, as Hengst put it, like a member of Deep Purple. Actually, I think the guy on the left shook Stern’s hand tonight.
I have no clue what the Hawks or Celtics were doing.
I have no fucking clue what the Rockets were doing. A potential #1 talent falls in your lap – basically this year’s Marvin Williams – and you trade him for Shane Battier? Shane fucking Battier? I don’t get it. I’m not a big Gay fan – insert joke of choice here – but I’ll admit he could become one of the top players of his draft. I can’t believe the Rockets would rather have a decent sixth man instead, but that’s what they got. Weird.
The Grizz made off like bandits, though. The Cavs, Mavs, and NOOKLOKOKO Hornets made good picks. And the Knicks are laughingstocks once again. All in all, the order of the NBA feels a little restored, even if the 5th or 6th best team somehow managed to win the championship. And even if it looks like the Raptors, Magic, and Hawks might be playoff contenders in the East. And although Iverson apparently might become a Celtic. And Garnett a Bull. Okay, actually, I don’t know what’s going on anymore.
But there are always these two eternal comforts: David Stern’s smug grin -- worn even as plotted the gruesome demise of Dan Patrick and especially as he delighted in torturing the Madison Square Garden fans by announcing boring trades before the (baffling) Knicks’ picks – and the Spurs drafting some foreign guy in the second round.
Onward to July 12, whence the free agent signings and trades can begin! Then we can really get the next fantasy season under way.
I think Bargnani fits well in Toronto, provided those highlight videos of him on the perimeter aren't being played at 1.5x speed. And adding P.J. Tucker to Joey Graham on the bench gives them good muscle, energy, and defense. If they can get a decent young point guard when they sign and trade Mike James, they'll actually be looking good for the future. How the hell did that happen?
Oddly, Portland had a very solid draft. They can take it as a good sign that Steven A. Smith was berating their choices. Nothing like Smith and Greg Anthony taking pot shots at easy targets, this time a franchise whose last few years are pretty pathetic. But they went way out of their way to piss on the Blazers’ draft tonight. Portland picks up two high lottery picks, including the most NBA-ready player (Roy) in this draft; a solid late first-round talent; and a couple long-term projects. All they give up is a busted former #13 pick, some foreign guy who’s last name begins, phonetically, with “crap,” Theo Ratliff’s useless ass, and a little cash. And yet, Smith claims he just has no idea what the Blazers are doing. Huh? What a fucktard. Anywyas, Portland needs to make dumping Darius Miles and Zach Randolph its top three priorities.
Adam Morrison’s appearance lived up to expectations. With that haircut he looked, as Hengst put it, like a member of Deep Purple. Actually, I think the guy on the left shook Stern’s hand tonight.
I have no clue what the Hawks or Celtics were doing.
I have no fucking clue what the Rockets were doing. A potential #1 talent falls in your lap – basically this year’s Marvin Williams – and you trade him for Shane Battier? Shane fucking Battier? I don’t get it. I’m not a big Gay fan – insert joke of choice here – but I’ll admit he could become one of the top players of his draft. I can’t believe the Rockets would rather have a decent sixth man instead, but that’s what they got. Weird.
The Grizz made off like bandits, though. The Cavs, Mavs, and NOOKLOKOKO Hornets made good picks. And the Knicks are laughingstocks once again. All in all, the order of the NBA feels a little restored, even if the 5th or 6th best team somehow managed to win the championship. And even if it looks like the Raptors, Magic, and Hawks might be playoff contenders in the East. And although Iverson apparently might become a Celtic. And Garnett a Bull. Okay, actually, I don’t know what’s going on anymore.
But there are always these two eternal comforts: David Stern’s smug grin -- worn even as plotted the gruesome demise of Dan Patrick and especially as he delighted in torturing the Madison Square Garden fans by announcing boring trades before the (baffling) Knicks’ picks – and the Spurs drafting some foreign guy in the second round.
Onward to July 12, whence the free agent signings and trades can begin! Then we can really get the next fantasy season under way.
posted by Matt at 11:35 PM
|
<< Home